ODD

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Should My Child Be Assessed for ADHD?

Monday, August 3rd, 2009 A Reader Asks:How do I determine if my child should be assessed for ADHD? Respect Effect Mom Answers:I refer folks looking for the definitive checklist for ADHD and ODD to the DSM-IV for ADHD, and for ODD.  These make it very simple to determine if one’s child should be assessed.In addition, here are some unofficial red flag ADHD alerts you rarely hear mentioned:•    As infants often appear colicky and easily over-stimulated.•    Always chewing on something, sleeves, collars, something.•    Often late to talk and toilet train.•    Often appear to have speech and hearing problems.•    Chronic interrupting.•    Lack of eye contact, especially during introductions.•    Rarely sit through an entire meal without getting up and running around for one thing or another.•    Trouble...

ADHD In Children: 14 Common Excuses and Defenses by Parents

Friday, July 24th, 2009 When struggling with a child’s difficult behavior, it is common for us to cope rather than determine the underlying cause. We get so deep in the thick of despair, it is difficult to dig out of it.Recurring Rationalizations, Defenses, and Excuses of Parents of Children with ADHD: Denial—“I’m not sure he has ADHD.”  (He’s difficult, but you don’t know why.)  “He can pay attention when he’s watching a movie or playing with his toys.”  (Kids with ADHD can pay attention under five conditions.)  “He’s fine.  There’s nothing wrong with him. He’s just… His dad used to… When things get back to normal, he’ll…” (The list goes on.) Self-doubt—“I must have bad genes to have created a kid like this.”  (Slow...

How Do I Know If It’s Asperger’s, Autism, or Severe ADHD?

Monday, July 20th, 2009 A Reader asks:My son’s teacher insists that my son has Asperger’s syndrome or autism. But I think it’s more likely that he has ADHD. What should I do? Respect Effect Mom Answers:I believe that many children with severe ADHD are misdiagnosed as having asperger's, pdd nos, and autism  because far too many diagnosing professionals do not recognize the true traits of ADHD, especially severe ADHD. Therefore, many parents feel hopeless and helpless.ADHD, even severe ADHD is very treatable when you take action early with proper treatment. I am committed to helping parents recognize these characteristics early, and give them the confidence and information to do just that.Going out on a spindly limb here, but many folks don't realize that... Autism...

Adhd Parenting: When Do Kids Learn to Tie Their Shoes?

Wednesday, July 15th, 2009 A reader asks: We’re having a terrible time teaching my daughter how to tie her shoes. She is six and has ADHD.Respect Effect Mom answers:Most kids will want to know how to do it by age 5. Children that show no interest in learning or have a lot of trouble learning it often have dyslexia or ADHD or both. (Children with ADHD are more likely to have dyslexia.)My son has ADHD and I thought he would never learn. Finally I wrote a little song that went with the actions and we practiced together, me on my shoe and he on his, step by step.As he got each step right, I gave him a few cashews as reward. After about three...

Adhd Parenting: A Poem About My Family’s Story

Tuesday, July 14th, 2009 I wrote this poem about my experience with my son who was diagnosed with ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) when he was four. By age 8, he had full-scale ODD, oppositional defiant disorder, and our family was in real trouble. I hope it touches you and gives you hope. The Turnaround  The quicksand of worry was starting to win.The more that we struggled, the more we sunk in.With fierce love and honor, we clawed at the rim.It was just so chaotic living with him. This man-child with blue eyes and bright golden curls,Who charmed the grandmothers and giggling girls,Would gut us and wrench us from every direction,Then cry for a break from our icy rejection. The torment and sorrow were too much to...

Children Stealing and Lying: How to Stop Child Lying and Stealing

Wednesday, July 8th, 2009 Stealing is a common misbehavior of children with ADHD.  One of the characteristics of ADHD is impulsiveness—acting without thinking.  When a child with ADHD sees something he likes, he often pockets it, puts it in his mouth, or walks away with it. Later, when he has a quiet moment, he will take it out for a good look at what he got.  If it is not as interesting as he thought, he might just discard it.When a child is caught stealing, he lies impulsively to avoid losing his stolen loot and avoid discipline. (That’s why stealing and lying usually go hand in hand.)The secret is to see the behavior clearly and stay calm.  Address the elements rationally and you can...

Child Stealing: If Your Child Steals from School

Wednesday, July 8th, 2009 Be alert, be aware, and check his belongings and backpack.  Be suspicious of the big red warning signs—things he says he “found” or “someone gave to him.” Make the “finding” excuse less attractive.  If your child says he found something, immediately go with him to turn it in where he “found” it.  If he steals library books, have regular room checks and ask your child to return library books to the library.  Confront him with the theft and take tokens each time.Donate some of his personal books to the library.  He must pay the fines with his allowance.  Use library restriction as a last resort. Train your child values and hold him accountable for his actions with logical consequences.  If you use these...

Child Stealing: If Your Child Steals From You

Wednesday, July 8th, 2009 Children steal for many reasons, especially children with ADHD. If you suspect that your child is stealing from you, you need to take urgent and immediate action before he develops a stealing habit.Prevention is the key here. Have a talk with your child and explain that you want to teach him the important skills of honesty. Explain that you want him to take and hold only items that are his. And that you are starting a new rule that if anyone steals anything from a family member, they must not only return it, but also repay 3 times the original value of the item. Illustrate this concept in several ways so you are certain that you child understands this...

Children Stealing: What to Do if Your Child Steals From Friends

Wednesday, July 8th, 2009 Parents of children with ADHD commonly complain of their children stealing. If you notice your child playing with an unfamiliar item, for example a pocket knife, ask him where it came from. If he says he found it, back off for a while. At least an hour later, say, “Son, I want you to sit on the sofa for five minutes while you decide what you’re going to tell me about this knife.”  If he tells you he took it from his friend, say, “Tell me three reasons that knife could be worth losing your friend.”  Review the problem-solving steps (from Session 33) with your child. You will probably decide he needs to write an apology letter (see Session 7) and read it...

Parenting: Challenging Child Warning Signs That May Lead to ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder)

Wednesday, July 8th, 2009 If your child has ODD (oppositional defiant disorder) or bipolar, you’re familiar with child behavior problems. If your child has signs of autism, ADHD or ADD (attention deficit disorder), Aspergers, or PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified), you may be seeing challenging behaviors.Five Warning Signs of Challenging Child BehaviorIf you suspect that your child’s difficult behavior is something more than just being a kid, these are the warning signs of a full-fledged challenging child.1. Refuses to look up into your eyes. This is one of the early signs that your parent-child relationship is in trouble. He refuses to look up into your eyes because that gives you power. He doesn’t trust you enough to give you that control. To... « Previous Entries